The Sad Truth

I just came out of my final for Psych.  A little bit of background on that class.  I’ve been doing fairly well ( a lot better than Adult Health).  However, I still needed to pass this Final to pass the course.

In Nursing School you have to have a cumulative average of a 77% on all tests.  Therefore, If you get all As in your assignments but you do not meet that average of a 77% on the exams you will fail.  Anyhow,  I studied A LOT for it, and as I took the exam I was relieved when I knew most of the answers.  However,  as time passes, I am feeling that dreadful anxiety that doesn’t let me breathe properly.  I have a tight feeling in my chest and I feel sick to my stomach.

The last Final I took, I failed and look where that got me.  I do not know what I will do if I fail the final I just took.  I used to know when I failed or passed, and now I am an uncertain mess.

The sad truth is that I do not trust myself anymore.




As I write this I am sitting outside my home (locked out) and I am feeling a little better by just looking at the trees as they move through the wind, feeling the breeze as if it were caressing me and listening to a beautiful birds song.

I love nature…it soothes the soul, gives peace to the mind, and calms my overly fast beating heart.


Waiting for Grades

If you read my previous post you are aware of the situation I am in.  I took my final for Adult Health and I want to say that I feel good about it, but not good enough to know if I passed.  Its definitely another episode of Pharmacology ( I just hope it has the same ending).  I studied all weekend and I studied till 5 this morning ( probably shouldn’t have done that…).

Naturally, after a big final our class went down for lunch (around 10 am) and we had a good time. I have to admit that what I am feeling is strange.  Last year when I went through the same scenario (some people just done learn) I was having trouble breathing.  Now, I have a pain on my chest and I feel an odd sense of stiff relaxation.  I have to consciously breath too- apparently I forget to breath because I find myself taking taking deep breathes.

One my close friends invited me to go out for a couple of drinks and at the time I wanted to go out and have a bit of stress free fun, but I am now feeling exhausted and I have another assignment to do.

I think I will go out for a run to just calm myself down & hope for the best-
Because at this point that is all I can do.

The way I see it

Over Joyed

I am so happy!

fjdshf hsd;k hf; f;ksdh;kflj dsa hf;ka!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!fkdahfkldsjf;lkjf;lkja!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I passed I passed I passed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Im in the library smiling really big and near to tears.  When I saw my grade I started laughing like a maniac- I’m insane.  The girl next to me got up and left- As I’m writing this Im giggling like an idiot!

I know I sound stupid, forgive me but I’m just full of emotion right now.

Last night I was having trouble breathing and my chest was hurting- all from the stress of not knowing if I was going to pass my Pharmacology exam.  “Nursing school will really be the end of me” I thought.  Nevertheless, here I am…alive and ready for this Christmas break!

Passing a class with a passing grade has never made me feel so alive!
I am so happy to be alive!

Some call me overly dramatic, but I cant help it!

Woo I passed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!